My dream for The Avengers: Age of Ultron is that it starts out with each of the Avengers getting a call early in the morning that they need to come in, and when they get to Clint, they’re like, “We still don’t have Romanoff’s new location, so if you have a way of contacting her, pass the message to her as well.” Clint replies, “I’ll see if I can track her down,” and hangs up the phone. Then he rolls over in bed and is like, “Hey Nat, get up, they need us.”
Sam’s reaction in the third gif.
He’s like, “Wtf did that brat just say to this lovely motherly lady who gave moose coffee?!? There better be wax in my ears or Moose is gonna beat a boy.”
when ur friend remembers ur birthday and u try remember theirs and you just
the more I think about it, the more I realize that 2009 me would be pretty scared/intimidated by 2014 me and that’s what counts
This just changed my life.
who are you?
Um… My name is Tommasina (weird name ik)is that ok ?
there are nice americans
there are rude americans
there are nice brits
there are rude brits
there are nice canadians
there’s justin bieber
Every year on Canadian Thanksgiving, we perform a ritual to purge ourselves of our rudeness, Bieber absorbs it all. He was never meant to escape, we are sorry.
He was never meant to escape.
…I’ve only seen this legendary post in screenshots
Merry Unbirthday, to you all!
Happy Unbirthday dear Tumblr nation
It could happen to anyone. People bury a person alive to scare them or to get rid of them. In this situation, rely only on yourself.
- Do not waste oxygen. In a classic coffin there’s only enough oxygen for about an hour, maybe two. Inhale deeply, exhale very slowly. Once inhaled - do not swallow, or you will start to hyperventilate. Do not light up lighters or matches, they will waste oxygen. Using a flashlight is allowed. Screaming increases anxiety, which causes increased heartbeat and therefore - waste of oxygen. So don’t scream.
- Shake up the lid with your hands. In some cheap low-quality coffins you will be able to even make a hole (with an engagement ring or a belt buckle.)
- Cross your arms over your chest, holding onto your shoulders with your hands, and pull the shirt off upward. Tie it in a knot above your head, like so: This will prevent you from suffocating when the dirt falls on your face.
- Kick the lid with your legs. In some cheap coffins the lid is broken or damaged already after being buried, due to the weight of the ground above it.
- As soon as the lid breaks, throw and move the dirt that falls through in the direction of your feet. When it takes up a lot of space, try pressing the ground to the sides of the coffin with your legs and feet. Move around a bit.
- Whatever you do - your main goal is to sit up: dirt will fill up the empty space and move to your advantage, so no matter what - do not stop and try breathing steadily and calmly.
- Get up. Remember: the dirt in the grave is very loose, so battling your way up will be easier than it seems. It’s the other way around during a rainy weather however, since water makes dirt heavy and sticky.
JUST TO PROVE TUMBLR HAS A SURVIVAL GUIDE FOR FUCKING EVERYTHING.
just in case guys
I’ll just watch one
Spoiler alert: adulthood is 96% of you going “well, I hope this is how it works and I’ll keep doing it till someone yells at me”
i wanna play twister with someone really hot
oops i fell & touched your whole body
Your body is made of the same elements that lionesses are built from. Three quarters of you is the same kind of water that beats rocks to rubble, wears stones away. Your DNA translates into the same twenty amino acids that wolf genes code for. When you look in the mirror and feel weak, remember, the air you breathe in fuels forest fires capable of destroying everything they touch. On the days you feel ugly, remember: diamonds are only carbon. You are so much more.
staying up all night
being woken up early the next morning